Saturday, March 28, 2009
Being Thankful.

Quite frequently, something happens in my life and I think, "I should mention this on my blog."

This is one of those unpleasant truths that I'm reluctant to come to grips with.

I think part of the problem is the word "blog." I never felt this way when I would think similar thoughts about the humor column I wrote, or when I think, "I'm going to put that in the novel."

I know a lot of people who struggle to think of material to put on their blogs. I'm the other way around. If I went with my natural tendencies, I'd be writing little stories up here every day, maybe more. Slowly I would move all my writing energy into the blog, then it would start eating into other parts of my life too. Drawing time and energy away from vital activities like eating and playing videogames. Eventually they would find my shriveled husk in front of the computer.

Because I don't blog all the things I think of, sometimes interesting little stories get left by the wayside. This ensaddens me.

For example, months ago, I was driving around with Sarah. We were bickering, which is like arguing, but cleverer. We're really good at bickering. We could bicker for our country if they ever made it an Olympic sport.

The key to our successful bickering is the fact that we argue about stupid shit. We're also articulate, witty, and in love. Lastly, I am funny as hell, and Sarah is absolutely batshit crazy.

This leads to great bickerings. Honestly, I wish I had a lot of them on tape.

So we're driving around, bickering, and Sarah says, "Whenever you call me a rule utilitarian it makes my womb clench."

And I thought, "I've got to mention this on my blog."

Not the reason for the bickering, which I can't remember. Not any of the context, which really isn't that important. I just wanted to share that sentence because I knew if I didn't, you'd never run into it at any other point in your lives. Ever.

Sometimes the blogs that get put off are more substantive. I put those off because they'll take a lot of time and energy to get right.

And sometimes they aren't hard to write, they just get buried in the ephemera of daily life. Then when I rediscover them, I think, "Shit. I can't believe I haven't posted anything about that yet..."

This is an example of something thus belated.

Those of you who have been on the blog for a while probably remember Captain Joe. If not for his comments on the blog, then for his strong showing in the photo contest last year....

After last year's minor debacle with the Locus Award, I posted a blog wherein I generally lamented the unfairness of all God's creation.

In response to that blog. Captain Joe sent me this.

And a close-up of the wordage.

Later, I found out he actually made it. Found the wood, burned it and glazed it. Installed the clock....

In short, it was some serious above the call of duty coolness.

So I just wanted to take this opportunity to share this coolness, and thank him for it in a very belated way. If I had my way, I would have them write "Winner of Captain Joe's Most Kickass Novel of the Century Award," on the new version of the book when it comes out. But I'm pretty sure the marketing people have their hearts set on the whole NYT bestseller thing....

Later folks,


Labels: , , ,

posted by Pat at


Blogger GP said...

id rather have that on my mantelpiece than a golden bald dude

March 28, 2009 2:28 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

Nice one, Captain.

March 28, 2009 2:49 PM  
OpenID roseneko said...

And I hereby crown Captain Joe with the Sexy Librarians' most Kickass Fan of 2008 award. (Picture forthcoming.)

March 28, 2009 3:00 PM  
Blogger Jeff said...

Pat, what you of course CAN do is put the award in the first few pages of your book. Like the on the dedication page. Although, in my opion he deserves a far greater honor. This might even top the sheer awesomeness of your beard. I also thinks this illustrates how you can move people with a novel, even change whole lives with it. I thank thee, Pat. For putting your heart into your work.

March 28, 2009 3:07 PM  
Blogger Anton Strout said...

Maybe another author can work that into their quote for you on the next book...

March 28, 2009 5:01 PM  
Anonymous tratc said...

cool, so what does this mean for the released date of book 2?

March 28, 2009 5:23 PM  
Blogger Chris said...


Dude, don't be a dick.

March 28, 2009 5:50 PM  
Blogger Elicius said...

This post has been removed by the author.

March 28, 2009 6:09 PM  
Blogger Elicius said...

@tratc: What Chris said but...y'know...Louder

Edit: Also; *Removes his hat and bows to the Captain* Good man.

March 28, 2009 6:13 PM  
Anonymous Sarah said...

This has to be the coolest thing ever! And I totally agree with roseneko =)

March 28, 2009 6:36 PM  
Blogger Sailor Matt said...

This post has been removed by the author.

March 28, 2009 7:24 PM  
Blogger Sailor Matt said...

I'd have posted a comment sooner, but my head exploded from the shear awesomeness of this post. Most of my evening was spent putting the pieces back together.

Oh by the way, ten minutes before Earth Hour kicks off here in CST. Y'all ARE supporting Earth Hour, right? :)

Thanks again for the uplifting blog, Pat. There's too much negativity in the world these days. Peace, Love and Happiness, my friend.

March 28, 2009 7:25 PM  
Blogger Althalus said...

lol, nice job Capt Joe!

March 28, 2009 7:52 PM  
Blogger Wysen said...

Wow, that's some hard core dedication on Cpt Joe's part. Kudos to him for that.

March 28, 2009 8:55 PM  
Anonymous Matt Burt said...

And thus did Captain Joe win the internet.

March 28, 2009 11:07 PM  
Blogger Sedulo said...

Huzzah for the Captain. I cannot believe we didn't know of this sooner. Well, so much for my chainsaw carving of "Naked Man Chest." It just can't compare.

Joe, how can you be so awesome?

March 28, 2009 11:16 PM  
Anonymous AndyB said...

"Whenever you call me a rule utilitarian it makes my womb clench."

Umm, could you diagram that sentence? Or maybe translate it? Maybe it's just my lack of sleep lately but I can't force the words to make sense.

March 29, 2009 12:28 AM  
Blogger a grey angel said...


That clock is amazing, and I want Cpt. Joe's FF sword...

...I have a totally Random off topic question though.

The other day I started reading The Neverending Story. As a child of the 80’s I wanted to see if the book could be any more kickass than the movie. As I started reading the book I thought about a joke that was made on the Simpsons (I think) about how the movie/book’s name was the biggest marketing lie in the history of entertainment, or something the like. Which led me to the thought, why can’t there be a real never-ending story? Could a neverending story be written?

The obvious conclusion, for me at least, was that publishers like to keep their books short, but that doesn’t have to necessarily matter anymore with websites, blogs, and e-books being able to handle any length of text with relative ease.
Imagine then that you could create a world that you would never have to leave. Imagine that the Mahabharata didn’t have to end at 5000pp. or that the 1001 Tales could have gone on infinitely.

I mention the two stories above for a simple reason. I imagine that the only way to achieve such a story would be to use the “story-within-a-story” frame or to write a truly “epic” epic.

The other option I imagine could be to turn the narrator into some sort of immortal, a god and his creation, etc. Then you could essentially just create a world and keep writing loosely connected stories pertaining to that world, a la some Final Fantasy games.

I would imagine the best way to release a story like this would be to publish continually, such as a chapter a week or a page a day (keep in mind though that if they are 30p chapters then you would have a 1500p story at the end of the year). The story could be written a year or two in advance to take into account of vacations and fatigue, in other words have a years worth of material written before starting the daily release so you at least have another year to write the next years material.

I imagine revenue could be made through ads if the story was on a blog/website, and If you kept the length reasonable the story could be printed in volumes (for reference, future generations, etc.). It could be marketed as a kindle subscription book (pay a yearly fee comparable to the price of a new hardback).

Sorry to post a question and then give a long explanation of my thoughts, I just am curious to know what an author would think, and quite honestly I think you are the type of author that could pull it off… just credit me if you steal the idea ☺

Sorry for the blog-length comment, just didn’t know your e-mail.

Patrick S.

p.s. – have you joined the twitter revolution yet?

March 29, 2009 1:14 AM  
Blogger Nathan said...

wow... cheers to captain joe. thats above and beyond the call of duty man... wayyy above and beyond. like, outside space stuff. and at any rate, you totally deserve that, Pat. so cheers to joe, and to pat.

also, i must add, there is absolutely nothing better than being funny, and madly in love with someone who is, how shall we say - absolutely batshit crazy? so cheers to you and sarah, pat. congratulations to you both in the highest. you deserve the happiness you undoubtedly bring to eachother - it seems not so unlike the happiness your novel brings to so many others, perhaps those of us unfortunate enough to not yet have found our "sarah" or our "pat."

take care

March 29, 2009 5:13 AM  
Blogger Nathan said...

PS: Pat? thank you for mentioning that on your blog. Thank you very much.

March 29, 2009 5:17 AM  
Blogger Captain Joe said...

Curses, thwarted once more by the New York Times...

Heh, I'd forgotten how shiny and polished that piece turned out. I can't claim full credit, though, however much I want to. A friend name'a Bill helped with the clock mechanism. Cheers to Bill, folks.

Pat, Name of the Wind was some serious above the call of duty coolness. If I can use fire and glue to return some of that coolness in kind, then all's in check and balance returns to the Force.

Stay out of trouble, folks,

Cap'n Joe

PS: Sexy Librarians' Award? Yes, please.

March 29, 2009 8:36 AM  
Anonymous Chrys said...

To add to the coolness factor of Captain Joe here just a bit - Captain Joe is in fact the reason that I found NoTW, not to mention this blog. Having read it three times so far in the less than seven months that I've owned it (I subract the time other people have had it in their possession) and having jumped up and down insisting that other people buy their own copies (dammit, I want mine back!), I'm clearly pretty happy about that. Awesome clock.

March 29, 2009 4:46 PM  
Blogger logankstewart said...

Wow, that is absolutely awesome. Of course, I would expect only the awesome or better from the good Cap'n. Fun post, Pat, and nice work, Cap'n.

March 29, 2009 4:50 PM  
Blogger Pat said...

Now now, Folks. Tratc was just making a joke. Hence the rimshot. An understandible mistake, as sarcasm is hard to convey in pure text.

I do appreciate y'all being willing to leap to my defense, but let's save it for the folks who are truly deserving.

March 29, 2009 4:50 PM  
Blogger Ebular said...

Phenomenal craftmanship Captain Joe.!! The closest thing I've come to that is the giant Dime I made for my high school's musical. Props to you for making it happen.

March 29, 2009 8:33 PM  
Anonymous Netbook said...

Wish I'd paid attention in 7th grade Shop class...

March 29, 2009 8:33 PM  
Anonymous sherryl said...

Wow Pat, another heart warming post.

As for Captain Joe, count my vote for the the Sexy Librarian's most Kickass Fan of 2008. :D

March 30, 2009 4:24 AM  
Blogger Sarah said...

I third the sexy librarian award... but what would it be? Gold statues are so pase.

Pat I think me and Sarah would get along fine, craziness is much better than being ordinary.

March 30, 2009 5:30 AM  
Blogger marky said...

"Whenever you call me a rule utilitarian it makes my womb clench."

That has to be the funny line of the year! I almost wish I was a girl, so I can use it!...Almost. One has to wonder about the kind of conversations you two have. Seriously, if you do ever tape them, sign me up for the box set!

Clock-Tastic, Joe! A truly wonderful piece of work. If I sent you a tree, could you do me a Big Ben? As always, I shine with awe at your many talents. Good job Sir, good job.

March 30, 2009 10:26 AM  
Anonymous maarten said...

Man... I just want that gunblade... Nah... I want it bigger. Thumbs up for capt. Joe.

March 30, 2009 11:58 AM  
Blogger SJ Stanley said...

I do sometimes wonder how well detractors would respond to being treated as they treat artists they supposedly enjoy/respect.

How nice to know that there are fans out there (a la Cap'n) who are more supportive fan, less Kvothe-deprived addicts who are currently beyond the reach of reason.

Cap'n, I support your support. And Pat? I appreciate authors with artistic integrity. Nothing worse than finding a series you love, only to have the author get bored with the characters 2 books in--and it's glaringly obvious in the quality of writing.

I'm eager for more Kvothe (and even perhaps a bit impatient), but I'm not willing to settle for poor-quality product cut with strychnine or something.

March 30, 2009 12:04 PM  
Blogger ichi214 said...

Mr. Rothfuss, just wanted to let you know that I am in the Air Force, currently stationed in Phoenix, AZ. I've pretty much gotten the whole base (Luke AFB) to read your book. Nothing but the best comments. Your writing has been a breath of fresh air for us all. Also love the blogs. Witty Stuff. Don't change.

March 30, 2009 1:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Obviously, your publisher has never met Captain Joe...

March 30, 2009 2:34 PM  
Anonymous The Big Blue Frog said...

This pretty much sums up how I write my blog. The big stuff gets left by the wayside, because it's too involved for my manic/depressive state of mine. The small stuff doesn't make it on most of the time because I feel like it has no substance. I finally gave up and started posting everything, and you're correct; it takes away from eating, playing video games, feeding the cats, etc.

On the other hand, I get to reveal such pearls as my resemblance to Easter Island statues and how it feels to taste Parmigiano Reggiano for the first time, so I guess it's a fair trade.

Unless you're a cat.

March 30, 2009 2:57 PM  
Blogger kyrshan said...

Way to go Capt. Joe
Pat do not let the world rush you that second book will take as long as it needs . Only you will know when that is I truly loved you first book it took me two days to read the first time and I have read it at least 3 times since each time I grasp something different so do not rush We who really understand will be patient

March 30, 2009 4:23 PM  
Blogger ZHooper63 said...

Ensaddens...gawd your funny.

March 30, 2009 8:26 PM  
Blogger An Average Grad Student said...

Dear Mr. Rothfuss

I humbly apologize in advance for the long post. I just realized it was this big when I finished it. I hope you will still find the time to read it.

I have an issue to square out with you. Your book is too awesome. As in too much. As in "it is so awesome that it hurts my life". If I had one.

Let me clarify: I am trying to finish my thesis. I actually have several guns pointed to my head, with a very close deadline. You can make a game out of picking which gun will splatter my (allegorical) brains on the (also allegorical) wall. My visa will expire. My fellowship is at an end. My sponsor back in Brazil will not pay me anymore. My wife will castrate me if I don't finish. My godson calls me crying that I missed another birthday, and that he would rather have me than the presents (which is cute since he just turned 6 in November). My beloved parents miss me. My advisor will retire. And the list goes on...

Anyways, the only thing I do that is not work or work related is reading. It's the only thing that works for me to fall asleep. Otherwise, I just lay there while my brain tries to estimate what the simmulation data is going to be, how I can fix the boundary conditions, and boring stuff like that. Seriously, I am not exxagerating. I can't sleep if I don't have a way to turn my brain off of work.

The good thing about this country is that books are cheap. The better thing is that I can get fantasy books galore. That is NOT true in Brazil. Books there are expensive. VERY expensive. Fantasy books are impossible to find, unless you feel like buying imported ones - which I don't have to tell you, makes it TOO expensive.

As many people, I am waiting for the next George Martin book. For the next Wheel of Time book. Meanwhile, I've been reading other stuff. Enough so my tired brain can rest. Last week I finished the Dragon Quartet. I had no idea what to read next. Then I found the link for your Feb/26th post on George Martin's blog. I read it. Browsed your site a bit. Read the reviews. And asked my wife if she could get me your book on her way back home.

Since then (2 days ago) I've been hard pressed to lay it down. Instead of relaxing me enough so I can sleep, it has turned my pseudolife in a real Hell. I can't put it away. I can't stop reading it. I can't work. I am almost done, but I know I will start it again. I'm not sure how this will affect (effect?) my deadline. But I wanted you to know that it is all your fault.

Damn you, Patrick Rothfuss, for writing such an awesome book. Damn George Martin for linking your blog. Damn the editors for publishing it. Damn everybody (except your Sarah, she sounds lovely). And damn the wind, whatever its name is!


p.s.: Kudos to Captain Joe. Damn him as well.

March 30, 2009 10:14 PM  
Anonymous Snall Trippin said...

I love e-people, everyone., as lone as they stay E. Also as to the never ending story- the writer would die. Like we've seen too often in the past few years....and really, another mind, however brilliant, is not the same.

March 31, 2009 12:54 AM  
Anonymous LoL said...

Great work Captain Joe... Represent Australian style! That is some truely beautiful craftwork. I would have liked it to say "kickarse" but I'll let you off the hook due to general awesomeness.

Pat, thank you for sharing that! You earned it.

WV: numpox. The contagious condition whereby Lolspeak is passed on resulting in the numbing of minds.

p.s. LoL has no relation to lolspeak. It's a RL nickname.

March 31, 2009 3:48 AM  
OpenID christinerains said...

Gorgeous clock. Amazing sentiment.

March 31, 2009 8:45 AM  
Anonymous Mark S. said...

Off Topic - R.I.P. Lorne (Andy Hallett).

Been working a lot the last couple days, so I just found out. Sad beyond words.

March 31, 2009 8:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey, anyone see this?

way to go pat, above LOTR you KNOW youre doing great!

April 1, 2009 1:52 AM  
Anonymous Isaac said...

eh...the NYT Bestseller thing is a Crock anyway...

April 2, 2009 11:34 AM  
Anonymous Kelza said...

Aw I love it! The bickering, the clock... 'Twas an award well deserved! :D

And the nickname -- 'The Beard' -- Bloody epic. Well done!

April 2, 2009 12:02 PM  
Blogger tickletik said...

This is really beautiful.

April 2, 2009 8:49 PM  
Blogger Aaces101 said...

Just found this blog and wanted to give my congrats to Mr. Rothfuss on an outstanding book. I must admit that until "The Name Of The Wind", the fantasy genre was not one of my favorites. Well, I'm happy to say that I have now been converted. Obviously now, like everyone else, I have been anxiously awaiting Book 2. Thanks immensely Pat!

P.S. Sorry about your parents, keep your head up.

April 4, 2009 5:11 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

dude, pat... i casually mentioned the sequel and when its coming out to a book clerk today. they hadn't a clue. but the 3 other book clerks and people from 2 different lines heard me ask and apparently i started some mad discussion in the book store today. i was just looking for some brent weeks to hold me over but apparently everyone at the local borders...(staff and customers included) have already preordered the sequel to name of the wind. i havent done i gonna be that screwed over come release date?

April 5, 2009 12:48 AM  
Blogger Captain Joe said...

@LoL: I spent a good three hours contemplating whether to say kickass or kickarse. In the end, I googled the difference, went and made a sandwich, and thought 'to hell with it, I can't be assed'.

April 5, 2009 5:04 AM  
Anonymous LoL said...

@ Joe: I guess the prize is for a seppo, even though he is awesome! I'm pretty sure "arse" is just aussie for "ass" anyways.

My main point still stands - fantastic clock, well deserved!

April 5, 2009 4:14 PM  
Anonymous Erica said...

No offense to Captain Joe, but this sad little marketing heart wanted that NYT line on the cover. It helps validate my existence within the publishing spectrum. I will say that is one kick-ass gift. I want a friend like Captain Joe!

April 5, 2009 8:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Patrick,
I would like to say that your book is one of the best books I have ever read and I think I have read at least several thousand at this point. I know that you said you would put somebody's name in your second book. My name is already in your book so I was wondering if you would consider adding maybe a sentence or two more for a character you already have. My name is Caleb. thank you

April 6, 2009 5:41 AM  
Blogger Captain Joe said...

Erica said: I want a friend like Captain Joe!

Heh. That's sweet. Thanks, Erica. Seriously though, I burn things and wield a mighty gunblade - is that friend material these days?


April 6, 2009 8:20 AM  
Blogger Wordlings said...

Patrick, are you aware Amazon has fuxxored your book listings? N.O.W. is listed as upcoming, to be released on April 7th. Wise Man's Fear? "Unavailable". No Pre-Order button or anything.

April 6, 2009 8:58 AM  
Anonymous Anna said...

It's a really amazing clock. It reminds me of the one my grandmother had. You are lucky to have such a nice gift :) And the people who will read your new book soon are lucky too (it's supposed to come out this month, isn't it?). I have to wait until the Polish translation is published, probably November. I could read it in English, if I wasn't too lazy :)
Thanks a lot for "The name of the wind", one of the best books I've ever read (and I really read a lot). :)

April 6, 2009 10:35 AM  
Blogger Sailor Matt said...

Captain Joe Said: Seriously though, I burn things and wield a mighty gunblade - is that friend material these days?

Dude, you're the kind of friend that shows up many years later wielding your new epic power to save your childhood buddy from a high-level boss that must ultimately be faced again later in the story. Everybody needs a friend like that!

April 6, 2009 4:14 PM  
Anonymous JeremyIAm said...

"Whenever you call me a rule utilitarian it makes my womb clench."
No that's just the kid growing...

April 6, 2009 9:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He has a gunblade... how coooooooooooool is that. Yeah video game's time is also vital for me a bit like eating... no I am kidding but I love playing video games I love your book too, most kick ass book of the century: it certainlly deserves it.

April 7, 2009 4:46 AM  
Blogger tinkandalissa said...

So, I just wanted to let you know that even though this blog post is several days old, the whole rule utilitarian/womb clenching thing has apparently cozied up in my subconscience. I had a dream last night wherein I happened to be walking for a very long time with some kind of purpose (dont remember that part, of course). During my trek, I walked by a huge billboard in a field that had that sentence as it's message. I said "Aha! That's where that he got that from!" The *he* being you, of course. Anywhoo. Just thought that was funny and strange.

April 7, 2009 7:38 AM  
Blogger Carolyn Watson said...

I'm jumping on here at a random post. I just finished Name of the Wind about two weeks ago. You, sir, are a fantastic writer and from what I can tell from what I've read of your blog -- also, a very interesting man. I look forward to reading through your previous entries.

April 7, 2009 10:05 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just want to say your books are genius! they were basicly the only thing keeping me togeather on the 52 hour trip back to iceland !
keep up the good work!

The Icelandic guy sibbi

p.s your blogs are really fun to read !

April 7, 2009 11:03 AM  
Anonymous K. L. Parish said...

Captain Joe, the cool you exude is ridiculousness and they'd probably make it illegal over here in the states.

That being said, I love a man with pretty wood.

April 7, 2009 3:13 PM  
Blogger Nathan said...

@Joe: hey man, I'd have to say that *these* days, if you *dont* burn shit or wield a mighty gunblade, you aren't worthy of pretty much anything, let alone being a good friend. I honestly wish I had a friend like you, too. Stay cool, bro.

April 7, 2009 9:01 PM  
Blogger jayjacob said...

Nice use of gaimanage there with the olympic sport thing.

April 8, 2009 6:22 AM  
Blogger Kris-chan said...

This post has been removed by the author.

April 8, 2009 10:18 AM  
Blogger Kris-chan said...

That's amazing. I think I may be a little in love with Captain Joe.

April 8, 2009 10:50 AM  
Anonymous Krista said...

Kudo's capt'n.

You and pat should get together, you could make clocks he could sign them with quotes from the could sell them and make money. for..>.> good causes and..x box games <.<


April 8, 2009 12:04 PM  
Blogger Captain Joe said...

@ Sailor Matt: You're damn right, dude. Rock on.

@KL Parish: If I'm exuding anything, I'm glad its cool. Heh.

@Kris-Chan: Hi there. Good work, you made me blush.

April 8, 2009 1:02 PM  
Anonymous nancy_l said...

that's a pretty pretty clock :) would love to have one of these :P

April 10, 2009 1:24 PM  
Anonymous LoL said...

Joe - Maybe you could make a "kickass fan" clock for next year's Heifer fundraiser? sounds like it'll get plenty of bids!

April 10, 2009 5:17 PM  
Blogger merriam35 said...

That clock is pretty awesome, so good job Joe!
And I would also like to give Joe the credit for getting me to read Name of the Wind. He recommended it to everyone on his yahoo group. After reading it I in turn recommended it to everyone in the bookstore where I work. And then all the customers who ask for fantasy recommendations.
So, besides just sending in awesome photos and a pretty cool clock, he also is responsible for hundreds of people in Victoria, BC Canada reading Name of the Wind.

April 14, 2009 5:21 PM  
Blogger merriam35 said...

That clock is pretty awesome, so good job Joe!
And I would also like to give Joe the credit for getting me to read Name of the Wind. He recommended it to everyone on his yahoo group. After reading it I in turn recommended it to everyone in the bookstore where I work. And then all the customers who ask for fantasy recommendations.
So, besides just sending in awesome photos and a pretty cool clock, he also is responsible for hundreds of people in Victoria, BC Canada reading Name of the Wind.

April 14, 2009 5:22 PM  
Anonymous Rawr said...

As an Australian i think i get claiming rights ti Captain Joe :P. The clock is absolute rippage. And as always, Name Of The Wind rules all others.

April 17, 2009 6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

thats cool i actually found you through captain joe i came across his fanfiction stories that lead me to his yahoo page which lead me to a video review of your book on youtube so i really should thank him for that

October 18, 2009 10:41 PM  

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